Thursday, April 21, 2016

The Single Struggle

Photo by Crooked Stream Photography
There are times you think you are alone in the struggle.  At times you think your struggle, your story, is much more profound. You compare each "singleness" story to yours and because you feel your story more, it makes you think your story is the greatest heartbreak story of all time!

A friend just recently shared a blog about her longing to be married and have children.  She was very transparent, letting us in on her struggles.  In my mind, she "deserves" to be married and have children.  Why?  Because she's beautiful, godly, humble, cheerful, fun-loving, has a huge compassionate heart, etc.  I could go on and on why she deserves her desires to be met.

She went on telling us the lies she hears from our enemy, Satan.  Same as what I've heard over and over again in my head.  He's the accuser, and we want to believe all he tells us because we want to find the reason why these desires aren't being met.  His lies seem to reign true.

In reading her blog, I'm reminded I'm not alone.  I have my own story, all us single women do.  And I feel I need to share mine so others will know they aren't alone. And to the single men who read this; please take note of this.  Understand where your single women friends are in their journey, and be sensitive to it.

I'm nearing 40, and I'm not looking forward to it.  Mainly because I feel I wasted my life without a marriage, without children.  And, if I do get married, there may be a chance I will not be able to have a child, due to my health.  There are many other reasons why being single is hard, this year.  And with this struggle, the lies are more prevalent.

- I'm not beautiful enough
- I'm not godly enough
- My past has cursed me
- I'm not adventurous enough to appeal any man
- My figure is unappealing
- My face isn't attractive
- I'm too serious for any man
- Wearing glasses makes me unattractive
- I don't know scripture well enough to attract any man I would want
- I'm so unintelligent, why would any man want me
- My age is making any man run away
- There are far more prettier single women than I.  They are more deserving of a husband than I
- I'm not spontaneous enough, and so set in my ways.  No man will want me.
- I'm not enough.
- There is nothing about me that any decent, godly, man would want
- God has forgotten me
- I must not deserve any such blessings in my life.
- My past decisions has made me deserve to be single
- I'm not accomplished enough
- Why should any man want me
...and the list goes on.

As I scroll through Facebook, it seems to be a running theme in the beginning of my news feed.  Pregnancies, babies, dating/courting, engagements, weddings, wonderful marriages, adventures with your husband, etc...  I find myself starting to become resentful, bitter, angry, and forgotten as I read each one.  I keep thinking, "Don't they know or understand that some of us can't bear this?"  Then I get back to reality, and answer myself, "No, Heather, they don't.  They are living and enjoying these wonderful moments and they want to share with their friends.  It's a good thing."

I have read many, many articles throughout the years about how to be single, how to deal with it, how to have the right perspective, and how to approach it.  There have been times of great contentment, and times of heartache.  I have found being single in your twenties, is different than being single in your thirties.  And as the big 40 is coming into view, it's starting to change on how I deal with being single.  I don't view myself as 39.  I have always had a younger spirit.  But that doesn't change the fact that I'm aging.  To see this reality, is very hard.  What it all boils down to is trusting your God, your Saviour, your Creator.  The one who loves you; more than the universe He created for you!

I don't believe there will ever be a time that there will be a constant contentment in being single.  God created us to long for a companion, to belong to someone, to not be alone.  It will always be there.  And in those times of true loneliness, God will hear your cry, and cry with you.  We need to remember He knows we long for someone; and in time, He will answer us with a husband, or maybe He will provide a great friendship that will fill that loneliness, or a task He has called you to do to glorify Him that will be enough for you to find contentment.

I'm still on this journey.  I'm still learning.  I don't have all the answers on "why?".  But this journey is not how you can get what you want; but to glorify God with what He has given you.  In your loneliness, cry out.  He knows your heart, He knows your pain.  Be honest with Him, but always leave that time quoting His promises and take comfort in them.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understandings.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path."  Proverbs 3:5-6

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, knowing that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Perseverance must finish it's work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."  James 1:2-4

To those reading this and relate; please know I'm praying for you.  You aren't alone in your "single struggle".
God's blessings to you! <3

Friday, September 23, 2011

Welcome Autumn!


Bright red apples and purple grapes, orange pumpkins and golden corn,

These are what the harvest brings in the land where I was born.

Frosty mornings and cracking leaves, Barns all filled with their winter grain:

When the harvest work is done, listen to the rain.”

~ Eleanor Graham, 2nd grade songbook.


I couldn’t resist reposting this phrase from Aunt Ruthie’s blog post!

Also, this print I came across looking for Autumn Prints.  Oh my, I have fallen IN LOVE with her work!  Go see Catherine Holman on Etsy!




Thursday, September 15, 2011

Dear Autumn,

HPIM2893 Oh, how I have missed you!

You are the colors of orange, yellow, red and green that thrill my heart!autumn watermark

Oh, how I’ve longed for you!

You are the leaves that we hear crunch beneath our shoes!

Oh, how I’ve dreamed of you!

You are the beginnings of harvest and the smells of homemade pumpkin pie!HPIM5678

Oh, how I’ve hungered for you!

You are the leaves of different shapes and colors that show God’s wonderment!

Oh, how I’ve wished for you!

You are what brings my heart to a place of warm childhood memories!good housekeeping, child baking

Oh, how I want to remember you!

You are the fire in the hearth with a cup of hot apple cider and a good book!

Oh, how I’ve pined for you!

You are the candles I light that will fill our home with a glow and a warm heart!

Oh, how I’m lit for you!

You are a blanket I snuggle in when I watch Little Women!Little Women 15

Oh, how I want to see you!

Please dearest Autumn, come soon!AutumnTrees5x7 watermark

Yours Lovingly,



Blog Blessing

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Mama’s Cookbook Shoppe Facebook Fan Giveaway

Hello Y’all!

It’s been such a busy summer, and there is more to come!  I’m very much looking forward to 2 of my dear friends getting married soon, in the same month!


I wanted to share a Giveaway that I’m doing this week for my Facebook Fans.

So far, there are 211 Fans of my Mama’s Cookbook Shoppe page.  Yay! 

I sure would LOVE to double that number this week!  And here’s how you can help me:

1.  If you are not a Facebook fan of Mama’s Cookbook Shoppe, yet, you are sure welcome to be one.  (click on “Facebook” to get there)

2.  Share my Facebook page with 5 Friends.

3.  Post how many friends you invited to “like”, on my page.

You have until this Saturday, 6pm Pacific Time, to do these 3 steps.

I will do a Random Drawing, and the Winner will receive a FREE Cookbook from my Etsy Shop of their choice!


If you have any questions, feel free to post them in the comments of this post.

FYI:  This Giveaway is for my Facebook page.  Entries posted in this post are not eligible.  Thank you.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

The Farm Chicks Show 2011

I haven’t been here in awhile!  Whoa! 

Well, life took over.  Had some ups and downs.  And writers block too.

But, I thought I’d share some photos of my time at The Farm Chicks Antique Show!

DSC_0071.NEF DSC_0049.NEF DSC_0052.NEF DSC_0053.NEF DSC_0055.NEF DSC_0056.NEFI have fallen in LOVE with Teal and Turquoise lately.  You can kinda tell by some of my pics. :)


DSC_0058.NEFNever seen anything like this before!  Very cute!


DSC_0060.NEFThe Best Peanut Brittle Ev-ah!!!! DSC_0061.NEF


DSC_0063.NEF DSC_0064.NEFFun!  Yep!  It was!DSC_0066.NEF DSC_0067.NEF DSC_0068.NEF

My sister, niece and I spent 5 hours enjoying this show!  It was our first, and my niece LOVED it!


Here’s a little anecdote:

I wrote a comment on Serena’s blog about my time at the Show, and guess what…

She wrote me back.

(insert big smile here)

Here’s what I wrote:

“Hi Serena!  That's what I've should've said when I saw you at the show Saturday while I was running wildly (walking really fast actually) at a few minutes before 6 to see if some of the items I was eyeing was still there.  They were, but hated to keep everyone who was getting ready for your dinner.  Ah, it was a regret though.  I should of got an old printing press block.  Ugh.  Oh well.  It was my first show, and I brought my sister and 10 year old niece, and they had a great time!  Hope to make it next year! :D

Her Reply:

“Well we can just say Hi! now then :)
Thanks so much for coming. And, now you have a good "one that got away" story. :) We all have one of those!
I hope to see you next year.



Wanna go with me next year????

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Giving Challenge: Revised Edition

Dear Blog Friends,

friends_havin_coffee copy 2

You may have noticed that I have not done a Giving Challenge the past couple weeks.

I have decided to do something different with it.

No longer will I post about who I am giving to, or their reaction.  I want my giving to be un-noticed.

What I do want to do on this blog, is show ideas of what others can do to give, and to also give encouragement in the giving process.

There’s a lot of “giving” in that sentence above, but you see (or read) my point.

The Giving Challenge is will still go on, and I hope you will be encourage!

Friday, April 15, 2011

Mother Says…

RetroWoman2-1 “Make your bed first thing in the morning.  It motivates you to have a clean room.”

It’s amazing how true this is.

Once that bed is made, it makes your room all the more less untidy.  It makes you motivated to keep that room at it’s best because that is your room of rest.  Oh, that rhymed!

You know that feeling you get when your home is a mess?  It makes you feel down, and just plain yucky.

Get Up! 

Make That Bed!

You’ll feel, oh, so much better for starting your day fresh and gettin’ the ball rollin’!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

A Drive in the Country…

A drive in the country…


relieves my worries,

calms my heart,

makes me dream of my future.


The countryside shows me…

HPIM4237 a simple,



traditional life.


The birds soaring above green fields,

and majestic trees reaching for the large sky.



Homes nestled in the quietness of the rolling hills.

Men working their land with their family and neighbors.



Animals grazing

and chickens pecking and scurrying

in the front yard.



Daffodils surrounding the homestead,

while the laundry is blowing in the breeze

on the wash-line.



An old barn tells a story of hard work.



A farmhouse tells a story of family love.


A simple beauty it is, to me. 

So beautiful it makes me cry…

and sometimes makes me want to fly.

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